Today has been a real battle. But, by and large, it's one I've won. Sure I had to get drunk to get through this evening but, considering how dreadful I've felt, keeping a smile on my face must be counted as a big success.
Going to my mothers this weekend. Hopefully the weather will be good enough to take the bike. Really not sure if I can tell her how bad the depression is. I know I should but it'll be the hardest thing yet that I have done.
I'm also finding it a bit weird knowing that so many people I care about are reading this. Everyone needs their secrets, but at the moment it feels like my life is an open book. It's creeping me out a bit. I still feel like I should be holding back a bit here. There probably are things I am holding back. But it's precious little.
I'm sure it's no coincidence that my darkest times are during the wee small hours when I can't sleep. I still believe that a god nights sleep will help my recovery no end.
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